I have been very busy this past days with all the stuff that has been going on in my life lately. I have so much to talk about I don't know where to start. This week has been crazy I want to really flip over I have no Idea what to do so I just went with the ride, I had a fight with mom, went crazy over board, drank, partied, and try to forget this growing pain in my chest and lately i have been developing symptoms maybe it has something to do with the stuff I have been doing I don't know trying to kill my thoughts I guess.
I felt so haunted with stuff with this past week I jus want to shut down and die at some point like today I woke up tired not wanting to go to work and looking at the ceiling telling myself over and over again "DIE!" but really I could never bring myself to pull the switch to send myself to death's sweet embrace I have to much in life to throw it away I mean i'm not into taking the easy way out. Well its a good thing I was able to access my blog here in the office even with its unrelenting firewalls and restrictions. I just want to scream right now and punch something something I have been wanting the entire week yet I act as if nothing is wrong even though my head is going through hell. I have been doing things I am not very proud of but what can I say I am not myself lately.
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